I sat in a hospital lobby in Israel once, in my early twenties, and passed the time in what I suppose was my big fetish at that age: I got into a philosophical conversation with the people around me. It happens that they were all conservative Jews. I asked them about God. Friendly arguments flew out in every direction, and the time passed with delightful efficiency. But as I had to rise up and go, we agreed on this: We don’t really know. At least not with absolute certainty.
Some people believe in God. Others do not.
Some people believe that humans are inherently evil. Others believe we are inherently good.
Some people believe their mother hates them. Others do not.
Some people believe in Christianity. Others believe in Islam. Others believe in Judaism. Others - believe in others.
Some people believe there are powerful conspiracies running the world, or endeavoring to control it. Others do not. Yet others believe that some of these are real, while others are not.
How can we know?
I’ve racked my brains over this question for most of my life. If I had to choose one thing to KNOW, I may very well choose how to know if I’m right, and how to know if I’m wrong. I feel like if I had that one thing going for me, everything else would fall into place rather nicely.
I doubt I’ll ever have it that easy. But here is what I do know:
We are not rational beings. We really want to believe that we are, but we are not; we are, in fact, emotional beings. Your guts move so much faster than your brain does. They know what they want right away. And by the time your mind figures out what is going on, your body has already chosen a position, and dug itself in. And when I say “dug itself in”, I mean that the entire process is often completely subconscious: Oftentimes, you won’t even know that your body has made its choice; but indeed, it has. Our minds are then left with a much more sophisticated task: How to rationalize what we’ve already chosen. And our minds are built to achieve this task, and they always succeed. We come up with amazing explanations for why our side is right, why we deserve a little ice cream every now and then, why it’s ok to stay up late just this once even though we have an important meeting in the morning, and even why it might be ok to philander, among other things.
Whether we like it or not, our bodies are in control, and our minds are incredible at making it look right. Ancient philosophers thought they could turn this equation around… It seems that they came to the conclusion that emotions are not to be trusted, and so they placed their emphasis and faith in reason and rationalism. But what can I say? They beat emotions to a bloody pulp, pushed them into the margins and turned them into taboo, thinking that they could live by reason alone. At best, they seem to have killed the lovely beauty that was passion; and with it, they have maimed the heart, the joy, and the wonder of this world. Where are we now, two thousand years later? We are a parched society - starving for love, dried of our emotions, and no closer to the truth than we ever were.
The truth is that, sadly, we are not really equipped to find the truth. At least not by searching for it directly. To put it simply: We can’t know if we are right or wrong. Our minds are just not built for that. They are built to survive, and truth has nothing to do with it.
So what do we do?
Being aware of this problem is, of course, one good step in the right direction. Bringing that awareness into your conversations can make a big difference.
But there is a lot more to it, and I think that there is more we can do besides just being aware. In this age of inconceivable turmoil, I want to believe that we are actually at a potential turning point. Because here is what we can know: We can know how we feel.
Why does that matter?
Why does that matter now, when everything seems to be falling apart?
That matters because in a world of malleable truths, feelings and emotions are true; they never lie. What we need to do is learn to use them when we navigate. The challenge is to be open and honest about your feelings, and about the feelings of others around you. When “facts” come along that you cannot be certain about, appreciate the fact that you don’t know, and don’t put your focus there. Focus on feelings - the ones you are feeling right now.
If you can do this, you may find that you can connect to other people on a whole other level. Deep down, we all share the exact same drives, dreads, and desires. And while this might not immediately tell you whether there is a god or not, it will put you on the right track, in two ways. Read on.
In the moment, connecting through feelings puts us on the ground of truth because feelings are real. Share your emotions. Don’t try to interpret them. Show people how you feel, ideally without words - because words are very misleading. Believe it or not, why you feel a certain way is not as important as what you are feeling. Dig deep into the truth of your emotions, where words have not had the chance to arise yet. This is the ground zero on which we can build true, honest relationships. You might be amazed at how much farther you can go when you discuss feelings, than when you try to discuss facts.
On a much deeper level, exploring our emotions can actually open up a door to much more profound truths than we might think are possible. This is because when emotions are the way we perceive the world - as I have been saying - it follows that the only way to the truth is to sort our emotions out. This is not for the sake of getting them out of the way, but for the sake of seeing them clearly. By doing this, we can ultimately improve our ability to tell the difference between how we feel, and what we see.
Experiencing the world at this level can give you a lot of insight into what the truth really is, because it makes it easier to tell when you are dealing with facts, and when you are dealing with opinions. This is where we really begin to scratch the surface of truly knowing what is true, and what is not. This has been discovered in the past by the Buddha, and other, similar figures. This is a long, arduous journey, and one of constant trials. But a deeper understanding of the truth awaits you, if you do choose to go there.
For now, explore your feelings. Be in touch with them, and by doing this, let yourself be in touch with the feelings of others.
Search for truth, and it will elude you.
Explore your emotions, and the truth will find you.
This is the great alchemy of the soul. Good luck, and good journey.
Photo by Ismael Sánchez, Pexels.com
Comments